Monday, October 31, 2011

Just One More

Not one more kid....one more person to coordinate with.

When we first started foster care we took in sibling groups or individual children from one family.  It made it easier to deal with visitations, GAL (guardian ad litem) and SW.  It may not seem like a big deal but believe me, it can get complicated with more.

At this time we have basically two separate foster placements, a teen and two sibling girls.  We are dealing with 2 foster care social workers, 2 GAL, 2 sets of court dates, potentially 2 different visitation dates (teen hasn't had any so far), as well as 2 adoption workers, one who is local and the girls original adoption worker from their county.  All the people in that equation have to do monthly visits.  Then quarterly we get a visit from the county licensing worker.  It can get crazy at times.  I am thankful that I do not work outside of the home and can schedule all the visits.  With the girls I also have the complication of having to take them to the nearest big city for visitation.  The October visit was cancelled but we have one scheduled for November.

When we decided to get our adoption homestudy we hoped that we would get placement of kids who already had TPR (termination of parental rights).  However, that did not happen so our kids are a legal risk case.  They do not have TPR but because of the number of  placements they have had they wanted them moved to an adoption resource.  Actually, their last placement was supposed to be an adoptive home but it disrupted.  That home had biological children but had never fostered.  They were overwhelmed by the behaviors of children who have not had stability for 2 years.  We are their 7th placement since coming into care.  With that many moves how can you honestly expect kids to not have issues.

It is hard to tell children that they are not moving when you realize that they do not have TPR yet.  True, they believe that TPR will happen.  However, we know how fickle the court system can be.  Our case is not even headed to a TPR hearing yet, they have a court date this week to change the status to TPR.  It has been our experience that they will actually change it to concurrent TPR and reunification.  They never really want to get rid of the reunification aspect until TPR has been granted.  Once the case changes then they have 60 days to submit for TPR, then there will be another court hearing.  With Anthony and Larissa it took 3 years to get TPR.  Our current girls have been in care for 2 years now.  I have a feeling that it is going to be another long road to get this adoption completed.

Our teen has also asked to be adopted.  Will there be time for that to happen?  Honestly, I would be surprised, the system is not that quick.  But, I am calling her GAL today to talk about it.  My teen hasn't even had one visit since coming into care.  True, she can stay in care until she is 21 but kids need a home to call when life gets tough.....even when they are 30.

We currently have 7 children, hopefully you will get to see us grow to 9, by some miracle even to 10.

3 comments:

  1. that is exciting/a big fat slow paper work mess!!! :) i am excited for your family to grow and so sad to hear about kids being "foster kids" for years...like my lizzy will probably be.

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  2. I took Jasmine home from the maturnity unit as a foster child. We did not get TPR until she was 3. Adopted her at 3 1/2. The wrong dad was named, they had to advertise, they had to test someone else etc.

    I hate when kids age out with nowhere to call home.

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  3. I've been reading your blog for a while. You're quite an inspiration. How old was your youngest biological child before you began to foster? My mother aged out of foster care, and I've always wanted to adopt or foster to adopt. My 5 children range from 3.5 to 9.5, and I think I'm getting closer and closer to the point when I'm ready to take the plunge, but I'm not sure yet. I know I want to have one kid old enough to leave at home with others should I need to run an errand. We homeschool, so I'd rather leave my others home if I were taking foster kids to/from school, appts, etc. That seems like pretty poor criteria tho... What else should I be thinking about?
    Thanks, Becky

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