Monday, November 28, 2011


I sat here for a long time looking at the blank screen.  I wanted to sound upbeat and optimistic.  However, my heart doesn't feel that way today.  I did call the place where we are trying to take the girls to see what the hold up is for an piece of paper.  So I called my doctor to see if they could get going on it.  I called the girls foster SW and left her a voice mail to see if she could speed the process up.  I left another voice mail with their adoption worker to see if there was anything she could do.  Tomorrow I will call their local adoption worker to see if there is anything she can do.  I have been trying to get in for a month now.

I contemplated making myself an appointment since with my insurance I can just make an appointment without that piece of paper.  I may just do that!  Some days I feel the need for some nice strong meds...for myself.  Just kidding you know....about the meds, not the appointment. 

The day started off rough and I am sure part of that was because I only got 3 hours of sleep last night.  Late night studying and early defiance are not a good match.  I have gone back and forth about putting Dimples into a 4K program.  Part of me feels that she needs to be with me to bond but another part of me feels that we might just get along better if I get a break.  This morning sealed the need to find a 4K program for her.

Next Sunday Dimples gets to sit next to us at church as well.  She was not too kind to her Sunday school teacher.  We feel strongly that church is not the place to act out.  The teachers are all volunteers and do not know how to deal with the behaviors.  So next Sunday she will either sit with John and I or in the car with one of us.  this is not new to us, Anthony has done his fair share of sitting with us during the service time. 

Actually Anthony gives me hope.  Although he was quite a bit younger then the girls when he came to us, he was quite a challenge.  Destroyed furniture, walls, defiance, complaints about behavior/defiance from daycare, complaints from Carnival cruise, complaints from school.....actually complaints from just about everywhere he was without us.  Lately the flare ups of defiance have really diminished.  He still has days when he shows his ODD side but for the most part is a typical 8 year old.  Uh, it took about 6 years to get there.  These girls are a few years older, I hope we get there before they are teenagers!

In the next week I will be finishing two papers, one presentation and taking two finals.  After that I have a few weeks of read some attachment books and do some Santa stuff.  Ha, I have to laugh when my kids say they want to grow up so that they can do whatever they want.  They don't have a clue!

Well, I am off to work on papers.  Have a great evening.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Can you name the band?

Can you name the band Sarah went to see?

Sarah is 18

I can not believe that Sarah is 18.

My partner in late night Walmart runs.

The years go by so quick.  When our children become adults it is almost a shock.  In my mind, I still see them as my babies.

I am so proud of Sarah.  She has overcome so many obstacles in life and because of her hard work she is doing great.  I know that I would not be able to go to college at this time if I did not have her to rely upon.  She is a great help to me and such a loving and thoughtful daughter.

She will graduate this May and is going on a mission trip to Italy this summer.  She is currently fund raising so look for her to open an Esty shop after Christmas. She wants to do missionary work after college and has already picked her college. 

She has truly been a blessing to me.


This morning I am at a low.  I am struggling. I am tired of the defiance.  I don't want to deal with children who defy me at every opportunity.  I am tired of being a jailer.

First Dimples was banned from playing outside without direct supervision.  Next Lily was banned from the same do to very inappropriate behaviors.  I guess they didn't realize that we actually do watch them when they are outside.

Then the spitting.....yuck. 

The "no" to my face.

The total disregard for anything I say. 

If you tell them to do something, they do the opposite.  If you tell them to not do something, they will find a way to do it.

Their bedrooms are barren.  This bothers me because I love to fill kids rooms.

John has offered to give his office up so that Lily can be moved downstairs.  I hate to do this!  She uses the distance for defiance.

Yes, they tell me over and over that they love me.  Many times a day.  Do I think that they love me?  No.  I know that they are saying it to keep me attached, they are not attached to me.  It is a manipulation.

How do you attach and love a child who is so difficult?  How do you help with the lack of attachment?

Yes, today I am struggling.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Family Time

There has been a lot going on at our house the last few days....

Tasha got home for Thanksgiving and put her ornament on the tree.

Three birthdays in November (Jason, Tasha and Sarah) meant that lots of gifts were opened.....

The dining room was ready for lots of family and friends.  I didn't refinish the chairs that came with the table but decided that some old chairs I had would fit great.  I started reupholstering the chairs but didn't get them all finished.

In case you are curious, the family/dining room is right off the kitchen.  If you were here I could give you a tour.  View from the kitchen.

Family room into the kitchen.  That spear above the doorway is from Hawaii.

The family/dining room leads directly to the Florida room (which used to be a patio).  That room is 500 sq ft and is used a lot.

Tasha took Sarah up to Charlotte for a concert.  (Thanks Tasha, you spared my ears)

Sarah was thrilled.

We ate lots of food.....and still are.

The weather was beautiful and the kids got to play outside. 

I got the kids gathered together for a picture.  Strange to have so few in the picture when there were three more that wanted to be in it but can't just yet.  Maybe is should be considered stranger still when I consider 5 kids together to be few....when did my perspective on that change?

It was a great time for family.

But, finally Tasha had to take off for the airport.  On her way out she handed me her life insurance documents.  Ugh, that is just not right.

Here she is in full uniform......

This is how I see her.........22 years ago on November 30th.

She is already back with her unit. 

Very soon she will fly far away from us. 

We look forward to seeing her on R&R.

It is going to be a very long year.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Another Project from the Lazy Seamstress

As usual this project does not involve any measuring. I originally saw it on another blog and it looked like such a fun project.

I bought my fabric a while back hoping to get some time to make this project for Sarah.  It is hard when she does homeschooling.  However, Tasha is in town and took her to a concert tonight for her birthday.  So, I got to create.  This project took me 2 1/2 hours to do.  I could do a second one quicker now that I have it figured out.

I used a hoodie to get a guesstimate as to how big to make the hat.  I curved down the front part a little.

I cut on piece for the top (cut on the fold so I just had to sew the top part), two arms, two hands, four black ears and two white ears.  The big white piece is the top of the hood. The curved side is actually the back since you want it to come around to the front.

I sewed the top part of the hood and added the black portions of the arms (if you aren't doing two tone then this would all be one big piece)  I tried it on and decided that it was a little too long so I trimmed it a bit (very easy to do at this point).

I sewed the white portion of the ears on one portion of the black ears and then sewed them right side together and turned them right side out.

I got someone to try it on so I could decide where to place the ears.  I then sewed the ears in place.

I realized that the pockets would need to be lined for comfort so I cut two white pieces to match the two black pocket pieces I cut earlier.

I sewed them together at the top and flipped them out so that the fur was facing outward on both sides.

I sewed them to the bottom of the scarf (this will be the furry side).  When figuring how big to make your scarf you need to think about the hand size that will go in it.  I did this for Sarah so I figured my hand would be a good fit for an example.  For someone with a larger hand I would have to make the scarf wider (or at least the bottom portion could be wider).

I laid the entire thing down and cut out the liner.

I sewed the hood together and added detail to the hand portion.  Make sure you get this on the right side.  I tried on the liner to check myself.  This step is not necessary but it does make it fun. (Uh, my paws are unside down, haha, the joy of homemade!)

Pin both pieces right side together and sew together leaving an opening for turning right side out.

I turned it right side out and sewed the opening closed.  I had kept the neck area open so it was very easy to sew together on the machine.

For pictures Larissa was willing to model.

In case you can't tell, it is a panda.  If this was for Larissa I would have made the length a little shorter.  (Yes, that is her outfit from yesterday, they have been playing Thanksgiving all day (between fighting)).

Sarah will get to open it tonight since the kids saw what I was making and the new little ones can not keep a secret.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011


Nothing like a little procrastination to keep me up half the night.  The kids came home reminding me that they had to dress up the next day.  At least I had gone to Goodwill to pick up some shirts from the clearance rack.  All the kids wanted to go as Indians.

I cut off the collars to use as headbands.  The kids were pretty serious about decorating them.

At 10pm last night I took a trip to Walmart hoping to get some feathers.  In the past they carried them, not anymore.  So instead I picked up some ribbon and pipe cleaner.

Not too bad for a pinch.

Larissa in her "shirt".  She knows that I can make something of it.  Ha, if I could only show Lily's face in her shirt.  She lacked confidence that it would become a dress.

Finished product.  I got to stay up until 2 am to finish this project.  I do enjoy doing these projects for the kids, I just wish I had more hours in the day to do all that I need to do.

My little beauty.

Well, the kids were all happy so it was a job well done.  One day I should be able to show that other little face on here. 

No, the dining room table project is not finished, it has stalled.  Two more days and we will be sitting at it!