Tuesday, August 31, 2010

I am not......

See this tomato? It is unclear because my camera has a hard time taking pictures of small items.

It is not supposed to be a cherry tomato. It is also the first tomato that we got off of our tomato plant. Obviously I am not a gardener. If we did not have grocery stores or farmers markets then we would starve.

I did laundry today. Maybe I should say that I redid laundry today. Do you ever do that? Go to the laundry room and realize that you left clothing in both machines.....for quite a while. So, I rerun the dryer because I don't iron, I pull hot items out of the dryer and either fold them or hang them up. Whatever wrinkles are left will stay. I also have to restart the washing machine because the wet clothing in there was a little stinky. Obviously I am not a great laundress. Even my husband says I sort my clothing wrong.

No pictures, but my house is trashed again. I see shoes, clothing, backpacks, junk mail, books, toys, cluttered counters, to name a few. Obviously I am NOT a maid.

I forgot Anthony's ADHD meds. It is not a good thing to forget his meds. I got a call from his teacher. When Anthony doesn't get his ADHD meds he loses control. He becomes mean. He become defiant and hostile. Those tiny little ADHD meds sure help him a lot. I didn't know that loss of control could be an ADHD thing. I always thought it would be more problems with staying still, paying attention and staying quiet. Who knew? I try not to forget his meds, truly I do because I like his teacher. But, I am not perfect. Sometimes I forget things, important things.

I am not a lot of things. I often fall short. But, to my kids, my husband and God it is OK. They love me anyways, just the way I am.

Monday, August 30, 2010


It has been a long day. I am tired. I can't decide if I want some chocolate or to just head to bed.

I took Lucy, Gabby and Maxie to the vet today (two different appointments, yep two trips).

Lucy is doing great, up to 34 lbs and got the last of her vaccines. Gabby's infection is about cleared up and she got her first vaccines. Maxie is a big one lb and has hookworms. Other then that he is in good health and his teeth are aligned (I don't know, guess it is a problem with Chi's). He got his first shot. I go back in three weeks with Gabby and Maxie. Geez, it sure costs a lot to take care of pets!

The vet took up all of my morning and I really didn't get any reading done. I did go online and review the notes for class. After class today I went to the library. Wow, they sure have changed from the time I was a student. I have until tomorrow to decide on my big project topic. I just can't decide. I'm too tired to care tonight so I will do some research tomorrow. I know what I would like to do it on but I have to have 8 periodical journal references and that is giving me problems. I guess the things that interest me don't interest others.

Jason did come and pick up Larissa and take her to dance class. I really don't like relying on my 21 year old son to take her to dance, I would like to have been there. I would have even gotten pictures! Larissa found her dance bag and was carrying it around after she got home from school. She was very pleased with it. Happy kid makes a happy mom.

Geez, 10 pm and I am ready to go to bed. That is so unlike me, I normally don't head that way until about midnight. But, I think I will head that way and grab some chocolate on the way.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Distractions Clarification

After posting about distractions I wondered if it came across as complaining. I just want to clarify that I enjoy my distractions. My kids are a joy for me (ha, well most of the time!).

My home, yard, kids, cars, pets, husband, all the maintenance that all of it requires are a blessing to me. I know that I have so much and even though sometimes it does all overwhelm me I can't lose sight of the fact that I can not take it for granted. Life is so fleeting, chaotic, fragile and can change so quickly.

I have decided that I want to go back to school. My husband is not requiring that I go to work. He says that I don't have to go to school, but he will support me if I do. I made this decision because living in a one income home can be scary. My husband is a few years older then me, what if something happens to him. Sure we have insurance but that only goes so far. We also have a four year old.

So, I am going to school and studying for a career. Thankfully, I have the luxury to study what I want and to take as much time as I need.

So, even though I have class tomorrow and I haven't finished the reading, I am going to go make some popcorn and watch some HGTV. I can always study in the morning when I have some me time.

Another Lazy Sewing Project

I decided that I wanted to make Larissa a bag for her dance shoes. Yea, classes start tomorrow and I just came up with this bright idea.

I am the extreme lazy sewer. I don't like to measure, iron or even pin (because you have to take them out). However, I do like that you can create a unique item.

I went to WalMart for some fabric and there wasn't anyone around to cut fabric so I grabbed a package of colorful fabric. I imagine it is for quilters. I cut four pieces the same size, no measuring or even checking for squareness. I then cut out a notch in one corner and used the fabric to cut one in the other corner. This will make the bottom and sides. I guesstimated what size I wanted.
I sewed the sides and the bottom together. Two pieces for the lining and two for the outside.

For that notch I lined it up and sewed it together. This gave me a block corner.

I did the liner and outside. Looked fine to me so I continued.

I made a simple handle then pinned it all together inside out. I sometimes get confused here trying to think backwards. I also use pins for this part so I don't sew the wrong part of the handle into my seam.

I left a small part unsewn so I could turn it inside out, or is it rightsides out. This is always my mystery step. Did I get the right sides together and the handle the right direction or even sew some random fabric into my seam.

All was good so I top stitched along the top part to close up my hole.

Notice I have beige thread. I will probably use that thread until it runs out. I don't like to change thread out unless really necessary.

I then cut some strips to put rope in for closing the bag. This picture is bad but it shows how I put the rope in and pin with a lot of pins. I don't like to have to thread it later. I use two even lengths of rope and have them wrap around both sides. This gives a loop that can be pulled easily and tightly very quickly.

For the bottom I cut a piece of cardboard off of a notebook and covered it with fabric. It can be removed when the bag needs washing.

Dance shoes, ready to go.

So, what do you think? I hope that Larissa likes it. One day I hope to have an embroidery machine so I can put names on items. Seems like such fun.

Project time, 1 1/2 hour. It could have been longer if I had gotten a surprise when I turned it inside out.

Saturday, August 28, 2010


Already I am behind in my reading. I seem to find so many distractions. Larissa's hair was in desperate need of a redo. So I tackled that today. What a fine mess!
I cheated and combed it out and braided it in a simple do right in the bathtub.
I am afraid that Maxie may end up a little spoiled.

I was worried that the baby would need OT after being held all day. I had to make sure he could still walk so I had Larissa crawl around with him on the kitchen floor.

We spent a large part of our day looking for John some RAM for his computer. We hit up 5 stores and they all either seemed too expensive or they didn't carry it anymore. So we came home and he bought it online for half the price of the cheapest store. Guess we should have done that first.
I did do some studying this morning since I have an online quiz I have to take by Monday. I haven't even started my reading for my Monday class. I do believe that this semester is going to fly by as I try to keep on top of things.
John has to work on Monday so I am going to have to rely on Jason to take Larissa to her first dance class on Monday. I'm kind of sad that I am not taking her. They didn't have any classes on my nights off. Naturally they were on Monday or Thursday. I picked Monday since John is home many Mondays.
This will seem like such a short weekend with John leaving a day early, I have gotten used to him having a three day weekend. At least he has a long weekend next weekend. We will head to the beach and hopefully Tasha and her husband will join us for part of the time. We will be taking my sister in law Cindy.
Well, I'd better go and study. Hopefully I can get enough read to take my quiz tonight.

Friday, August 27, 2010

I am Weak, so Weak!

We got a chickawawa. Weak moment for me. What can I say but welcome to Maxie.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Bullying Update

I am happy to report that Sarah is happy!

It is not just because she is sitting there with her Hello Kitty blanket, laptop, phone and TV remote all within reach.

Sarah is happy that she decided to go back to school this year. She has not had any problems with bullying. She did have one incident where a girl told a boy that Sarah liked him, but it wasn't a bullying incident, just embarrassing.

I think it helps that she is gone half the day to ATEC. This semester she has drama, algebra 2 and ATEC (commercial art). None of the girls who bullied her before are in her classes. Also, ATEC has their own lunch so she doesn't see them at all.

I hope that next semester goes as smoothly. She will have English, history, science and yearbook. Sarah says that it seems like the kids have grown up a little over the summer. They don't disrupt the teacher as much and seem more interested in doing their work.

So, as you fellow moms of teenagers know, if the teenager is happy then the entire household is happy.

I'm off to study.

Good Night and Sweet Dreams everyone.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Hiatal Hernia Anyone?

I have known for awhile that I have a hiatal hernia. It hasn't given me too much trouble except for the other day when I got sick. Literally, nothing would go down to my stomach. It was blocked off for three hours. Do you know how much spit you produce? Wow, a lot! I got some stronger meds and hopefully that will keep it happy for awhile.

I also got a prescription for my thyroid meds. It would be nice if I could blame all my weight gain on my thyroid issues, but I am sure that my lack of exercise is partially to blame. I am not sure how much though. Seems like I have gained about 5 lbs every year since my thyroid issues were diagnosed. Not too long ago my thyroid was "out of whack" according to my Texas doctor. So, both Larissa and I are going in next week to get out blood drawn. Guess we will have to go out to breakfast together afterwards. Can that be counted as a bonding moment?
I did ask our family doctor about Anthony's bug problem. She finds is concerning given his family history and his own. We are trying to find a doctor to see about medicating for his bipolar. Could it be a manic thing? Right now we are just documenting and hoping it is an odd thing. But, if it happens again then we will have to investigate further.
In other child news, I lost Anthony today. Not really, but his bus driver and I are at odds. We live two houses away from the bus stop and the bus driver has told me that if I am not standing on the corner where he can see me when he comes down the main street then he will not drop off Anthony. He said he would be there at 3:05 every day. I imagine that you can see where this is leading.
Today I head out of the house at 2:57 (according to my computer so it must be accurate) to wait for Anthony. Normally I get there at 3 and wait about 5 minutes for him to come. So, I am standing there counting grass blades wondering if they had a fire drill or something. The sweat is pouring down my back and I am afraid to go inside to check on the time because I know that will be when the bus will come. I don't wear a watch because I use my cell phone to tell time. Don't you?
Finally, Sarah's bus comes and I know that hers comes at 3:30 so I head in to call transportation. They try reaching the bus driver and he doesn't answer. I call the school and they say he did get on the bus. At this point I realize that the bus driver must have come early and just kept on going. I call transportation again and they finally tell me that the driver did pass my street and he will drop him off at the end of his route.
So, at 4:15 the bus driver comes right to my front door. I tell him that he had to be early because I was at that corner by 3. He says that he must have just missed me. I told him that I didn't have time for this and that I would be picking Anthony up from school from now on.
So, just in case everyone thinks I am actually sitting home eating bon bons, just drive my schedule one day. New schedule, I will leave the house by 7am to drop Anthony, Larissa and now Sarah off by 8, pick Larissa up at 11:30, pick Anthony up at 2:40. Two day a week leave at 3:30 for class in town, take kids to Tae Kwon Do at least one day a week (the school says do three, hahahaha), attempt to hit some Wednesday church nights, help with algebra and study sometime for myself. I wonder if that is why my hiatal hernia is acting up.
In my school news they want more documentation about my residency. Geez, I may yet be out of state. So, I have a book of documentation that I need to send them and naturally right in the middle of printing it up I run out of ink. I have a new computer and a new printer. Neither is set up yet. The computer needs the drivers for the wireless card and I can't find them. So, I need to look them up and save them to a flash drive and transfer it to the new computer so I can be online. The new printer will be set up to that computer. well, all this is leading to say that it required a trip to Walmart today to get ink. I now have everything but don't know if I should fax it or take it in. Taking it in will require at least a 2 1/2 hour block of time. Ah, I will fax it.

I cancelled my pets vet appointment for tomorrow morning. I will be taking the kids to school and then coming home to study! I REALLY need to do some reading . I have a quiz on Monday in one class and haven't even begun that reading. Next semester I am definitely only taking two classes!

So, finished with my daily rant and am off to do laundry and clean up. I refuse to post a picture of my kitchen....imagine the one a few days ago.....the before.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

MRI Results

Larissa is learning to write her name. She has the L, A and I down pat. Oh yea, she has it down so well that she wrote it all over her bedroom. She was supposed to be in bed.
She is not supposed to go into her sisters room and take her highlighters.
That is one of the dangers of having little ones and teenagers, more dangerous writing opportunities. Did you know that highlighter is not easy, uh sometimes impossible, to get off the walls and furniture. Looks like I will put painting on my list of things to do (one day).
Today we went to the neurologist to get the results of Larissa's MRI. Thankfully, everything was normal on her MRI.
Unfortunately, her seizures have gotten worse. Imagine driving down the street and then realizing that your child has fallen asleep, you notice because you hear the choking noise coming from the back carseat.
When they first put her on Keppra we saw some positive results. The seizures got better, less frequent and less severe. However, as we have increased the meds I have noticed that the seizures are now getting worse and more frequent. She had three of them within 15 minutes the other day when she fell asleep next to me.
We are increasing meds again, get blood work in a week and come back in a month. We will probably look at changing meds at that time.

While sitting in the waiting room Anthony gave me a concern. He was agitated and rubbing himself. He told me that he had bugs crawling all over himself. I asked him when he started having bugs and he said in the car. So the bugs followed him from the car, through the parking garage, up the elevator and into the waiting room. He wasn't sweating or ashy (dry) so that didn't explain the bug crawling feeling. I told him that I didn't see any bugs. He told me that he could hear them buzzing. There weren't any bugs. I found the entire incident kind of concerning. Something else to keep an eye on I guess.
So far this year Anthony has been doing great. I am so glad that we held him back in Kindergarten last year. He was not ready to move up. He has had 7 good school days in a row, that is a record for him.
In other kid news, Jason has a job interview tomorrow. I sure hopes he gets this job, he needs it.
Sarah got a 86 on her algebra quiz. I guess I am not too bad of a math teacher. She has always struggled with math.
Well, I am going to try and be good today and go to bed and read. Maybe I will go to sleep before midnight tonight.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Feeling Overwhelmed at the Moment

As of today I have attended each of my three classes. The two books that appeared optional at the bookstore are not so I got to go spend another $100 on books. That gives me a total of $500 on books for 3 classes. I don't remember books being that expensive years ago.

It is hard to believe that I graduated high school in 1981. Then I attended numerous colleges before finally earning my bachelors degree in 1999. Moving all the time with the military makes it hard to complete the hours necessary unless you go with one of the colleges affiliated with the military. The main problem with that is that the degree types are limited. I got a degree to finish, not necessarily in something I wanted. This time around I am getting a degree in something I want.

Today I felt odd, I was the only student not working outside the home. There were only two of us not working in the educational field. I guess I need to get used to that idea.

Since I am not working then why do I feel so overwhelmed and tired at this point? I haven't done very much reading because once I start it about puts me to sleep. Ha, I guess I should be in bed instead of on this computer right now. I am a night time person and am finding it hard to go to bed earlier.

I have numerous books to read, online articles to read, need to mentor a child, observe a child with autism for 5 hours, do at least three projects, write several papers (I am not even sure how many at this time), and two presentations to give. I think that one that is an hour long is my biggest concern. How do I talk about something for an hour?

Well, I need to stop whining since I signed up for this torture, uh educational experience.

Tomorrow morning John will head back to Augusta and I will take Larissa to her follow up neurologist appointment. Wednesday I have a doctors appointment. Thursday the pets have a vet appointment. One day I need to fit in some Martial Arts. Thursday is class. Studying will fit in somewhere since I do have a quiz due next Monday. It looks to be a full week.

Guess I'd better head to bed, 6 am comes way too early for me.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Different states, Different rules

I have done some researching today. I really should be doing some studying instead!

Do you realize that every state has different compulsory school age requirements? There are many state that allow kids to drop out at the age of 16. Here in SC kids can drop out at the age of 17. Thankfully, there are some states that require students to be 18. In AZ you can drop out at 14 if your parents consent.

Here in SC a child can also leave home at the age of 17. What I find odd is that we parents can not force them to come home but we are responsible for their actions until they are 18 years old. How can you be held responsible for the actions of your child if you can not force them to live under your roof?

If you call the police to report your child has run away and they are 17 years old, they will not file a report. The child is free to leave. On the other hand, if they want to come back you have to take them in. You can not force them to leave until the day they turn 18.

Seems to me that all the states should require students attend school until they are 18 unless there are special circumstances. Also, if kids are allowed to leave the home and the parents have no control, then they should not be held responsible for the child's actions.

It just seems to me that kids have so much control at an age when many of them are really not ready to be self supporting. They are at that age where they THINK they know everything, it can be a dangerous age!

Well, I need to stop these musings and go read a chapter or two. Tomorrow is Monday already and so much to do.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Busy Saturday

When I say my house is a mess, I really do mean it is a mess! This morning I woke up feeling fine and then I walked into my kitchen, yikes. It seems like every flat surface in our home accumulates stuff. My objective today was to tackle the kitchen.
I can honestly tell you that I will never buy one of those flat top cooking surfaces again. That thing never seems to clean up well and has developed little scratches for the grime to live in.
I would also like to know why they have these self cleaning ovens that spew nasty smoke into the house. It seems like all the smoke does is set off my smoke detector and coat everything in the house with a nasty smell that is hard to get rid of. We opened all the windows, turned on fans and sent the kids outside with the dog. Still after 30 minutes we had to turn it off, it was just too nasty and my eyes were stinging. After yesterdays fire extinguisher incident I about asphyxiated myself today with a self cleaning oven. Tonight the house still stinks and my oven never got cleaned.
Lately I have really been thinking of hiring a cleaning person (or crew) to help me keep the bathrooms and such clean. I worry that if/when I add foster kids then I will be overwhelmed. I have had a hard time finding anyone. In one ad I read the person stated that they didn't do bathrooms! Uhh, that is the main area I want done. Seems like they need to think about their career options. My sister in law has been looking for a part time job so she wants to do it. I am going to do that, she knows what slobs we are. So, hopefully it will be mutually beneficial.
Besides getting the kitchen cleaned, we made it to the farmers market for some fruit. It is really a tiny farmers market but they have some great peaches. Larissa fell there with her cookie and cried and cried. She fell in the grass and wasn't hurt and got a new cookie but she was just so hard to console. When she was younger she would run from us when she got hurt. She didn't want held. I really don't know what to do about the overreaction to any hurts. With her past attachment issues you can't just tell her she will be OK. You have to pick her up and hold her tight while she cries terribly. She seems to have such a deep pain that hurts me so. After being carried around, getting a new cookie (OK, two) and a straw of flavored honey she perked up and was back to her happy self.
We also drove downtown so I could buy the rest of my school books. I have spent a total of $400 on books for three classes. I could only find one of them used. The class I have on Monday had two other books that he had marked as optional. I haven't purchased them yet, I am waiting to go to class on Monday and see why they are optional.
Then we took the kids to watch Nanny McPhee. The kids really enjoyed it. I enjoyed it too. No swearing, killing and such. Sarah says that they are too predictable and I agreed, but sometimes I want a predictable happy ending. I wish that more things in life had such a predictable, happy ending.
Well, tomorrow we are off to church so I need to get off this computer. I need to do some reading tomorrow too. Getting into a schedule of doing my homework is going to be a challenge. Oh, I need to do Larissa's hair too.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Fire Extinguishers

Do you know what is in a fire extinguisher? Do you know how far that stuff can go?

Today we were gathering fire extinguishers at the armory when the soldier I was working with accidentally set one off. Oh my.....that fine powder can travel.....fast.

Needless to say, we spent a long time trying to sweep that fine, powdery substance up off the armory floor. Just regular sweeping wasn't working. Out Sergeant suggested spraying the brooms with some dust stuff he had. We sprayed it on the brooms and were finally able to get the stuff up.

Uh, the armory now smells like Pledge. If you take your shoes off you could slide around in your socks. I think we may be back in a short period of time mopping that floor with ammonia or something to take the "slide" out of the concrete.

That was the sum of my day. Now I am sick so to bed I go.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

It's been a Long Day

Busy day for me, dropped my kids off at school, headed to the drill hall, got off work in time to head to class, got home and helped Sarah with algebra. Have I ever mentioned that I really don't like algebra? I don't think that I have ever used it in my daily life but I sure have done enough of it helping kids and John with homework.

My babysitter Jason was waiting and waiting for Larissa to get home after school. He got concerned that maybe he didn't get there in time and missed her bus. It had been coming between 11:30 and noon. Finally, her bus showed up at 1 pm. I am not happy with that. They told Jason that that would be her normal drop off time from now on since they got a new student. Add one student and you add over an hour to her drop off time? More then 2 hours on the bus for a 3 hour class is not working for me. Tomorrow will be her last day on the bus.

So, my new schedule will be drop kids off, be home around 8, leave at 10:30 to pick Larissa up and go home. Anthony gets home around 3 and Sarah 3:30. Two days of the week I have to leave as soon as Sarah walks in the door to get to class on time. One day Larissa will have dance and then they have martial arts. I really don't like this schedule because it makes getting into town to run errands difficult because of the way my day is broken up. Oh well, I really have no choice but to deal with it.

Class was interesting and I do believe I am going to enjoy it (well, to a certain extent). I have a lot of reading to do, papers to do, mentoring to do, tests, quizzes, and a 60 minute presentation to give. The presentation worries me the most, how can you talk about something for that long? I haven't made it to my third class yet so I don't know what those requirements will be. I hope that I do OK with three classes. I have been wondering if I should have taken just two! I have already decided that I will take three years to finish. John suggested that I take longer, LOL. He doesn't like to write and he sees all these papers I have to do.

Yes, I was the oldest person in the class....by quite a bit. Some of those kids are soooo young. At least a few are a little closer to me in age. I hope that I don't get senile before I finish, it would be nice to be able to actually use my education.

I got the algebra problems correct that I/we did yesterday, I hope that the ones done today are correct as well. Hard to tell because I am so tired today. I am not even going to attempt to read tonight. I am going to try to go to bed early tonight, at least by 11 pm. I am a night person so going to sleep before midnight is hard for me.

Goodnight all.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Go with the Flow

I should know by now that my plans don't always work out. Plans for tomorrow were to drop kids off at school, take Lucy to the vet for her last shots, come home and clean this mess and then later head to school.

Well, one phone call from my National Guard unit and I was calling the vet to change Lucy's appointment and lining up a babysitter. I was asked if I wanted to work Thursday and Friday instead of drill weekend next month. Sounds good to me, I can be home when John is here.

So, tomorrow I will drop kids off at school, go to my unit to work, go to school and then home (to help Sarah with algebra I imagine).

I took the kids to USC to get my ID card and books. The lady doing the ID cards thought that Sarah was the student. I had to tell her that it was actually this old lady. She said that I gave her hope because she has been thinking about going back to school.

We went to the bookstore and only one of my classes required a book. Of course, that one book cost $140. I wonder what the other two classes will require. I don't think that I have ever had a class where there wasn't a book up front. I guess I will know tomorrow.

As we were walking around campus I was explaining that this was where I was going to school to be a teacher. Anthony informed me that I couldn't be a teacher, I was his mom! Hmmm....wonder if I have stayed at home too long. I explained to him that many of his teachers were moms and that moms could be teachers, doctors or just about anything they wanted to be. This was such startling news to him.

So, tomorrow I will be a student. I am still trying to accept this Gamecock thing. We walked around the bookstore and some of the shirts had slogans on them that would be considered quite inappropriate in other areas!

New adventure, I think for all us.

Sarah just showed up with her algebra book, guess I'd better go. I wonder if I can find her a math tutor.


It was pointed out to me that I am going through a grieving process. I hadn't looked at it that way but now that I take a look around my house I can see that it is true.
It didn't just start when I put my child on the bus back to Kim's. On the day that I told Joselin no and she told me that she was old enough to do what she wanted, I realized that she only came home because she knew that in our state you could leave home at 17. Where my friend lives kids can not leave at 17, they must be 18.
She did not come home to work on a relationship with the family. She came home so she could have her freedom. Unfortunately for her, she didn't realize how unprepared she is to be on her own and she only lasted 5 days before she had to come back. Her anger was terrible after she came back. Upon realizing that she couldn't do it, she took to blaming everyone.
She is in a safe place now. She is in a state where she can't choose to drop out of school. Kim is going to try and get her into Job Corps, but we are concerned that she won't be able to pass the basic test to get in. She has 11 months until she is 18, I hope that she does what she needs to better prepare herself.
It has been a month of grieving, I need to get back to my family.
My house is a mess! Every room is a disaster, the laundry has piled up. I don't know how that happened. My attentions were elsewhere but I need to bring them back home.
See, I have other kids relying on me. I have this one in my lap right now........

She has had two seizures since she fell asleep in my lap. She sees the neurologist next week.

I can't allow the needs of one child to destroy the family. I can't allow one child to take away my effectiveness to parent the rest of my kids. I have kids with lots of needs that must be met. I have healing children who give me hope.

I haven't given up on the lost one, but I have gotten past the depression and anger and have reached a feeling of acceptance. I have to accept that we have given all that we can and it is now up to the child to determine her future. Sometimes, as hard as it is, you have to let go.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

DIY Book Cover

T-shirt ready for the trash bin...... Algebra book needing covered.

Sewing machine, Christmas present from my fantastic husband.
No measuring, no marking. I cover the book with the shirt and pin where it needs sewing. Normally I do this with jeans and put the back pocket on front.

One of a kind covered book..........happy kid.

Hey, sweeite, found these for you.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Day of Joy/Day of Sadness

The joy............

Required first day of school pictures. Yes, Reptar backpack.

My day started at 5 am when school transportation called me to tell me that they would be picking Larissa up at 6:15 am. By 5:10 am I realized that they said 6:15 am so I called them back and said I would take her. They could bring her home. She got home at 1pm.....her class ended at 10:45. Uh, that is not going to work either. Two hours on the bus for a 3 hour class. I am contemplating taking her out of this program and increasing her extracurricular activities and private speech. I am not making a decision right now.
Everyone had a good day. Sarah's main complaint was her math teacher, she got homework on the first day of school. I got to help her do a word problem tonight, I don't like word problems. How fast is the elevator in the Washington Monument in miles per hour given the feet per second, yuck.
She didn't have any issues today with kids. I am hoping that the bullying issues don't resurface.
Anthony had a green day, which makes it a good day. He has grown some over the summer so I really hope that he can function better this year. Typically he has a first good week so I am enjoying it.
I think that it is going to be a good year for these three.
I start classes in Thursday and haven't even bought my books yet. Have I ever mentioned that I have to fight my procrastination issues? However, I do look forward to attending classes and seeing adults!
The sadness...............
It has actually been a hard day for me, my heart is breaking and I am trying to hide it from the kids. They have their own issues to deal with and don't need to see me crying. I did that in private today. Joselin is gone.........she is on a bus back to Memphis. She says she is done with us.
She came home and couldn't deal with our rules. Really, our rules are not that difficult, have I ever mentioned that I am a big softie? Things like don't lie, steal, sneak out the window at 2am, respect others in the home....all too difficult. Her stealing used to remain in the home, she started stealing from her friends. Calls from parents started.
She just reached the point where she didn't care anymore. I still care. Regardless of what she thinks or wants, we are still her family. I told her that, she says she rejects us. Today I just don't feel the hope that I normally have in my heart.
I could say profound things about adoption, love, how biological children have the same issues, how to keep giving in spite of the challenges, however, all I can think to say is that sometimes parenting just plain sucks!

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Lazy Sunday

Quiet day here today. Three kids ready for school tomorrow, outfits picked and backpacks packed. I just need to remember to make Larissa's breakfast and Anthony's lunch in the morning.

After church we headed to our favorite lunch spot where I pestered the family with my camera.

Some are impatient for their food.
Sisters (Sarah got her hair dyed yesterday)

Lucy is such a gentle puppy.

Hope you had a great weekend.