Wednesday, January 22, 2020

Noah is 4

Noah is now 4, those babies sure grow up fast. I think I just said that in another post but it is so true!

We went to Kassi’s house and brought him a bike. 

I remember the day he was born, little baldy. Kassi has really grown as a mom although she struggles like many single moms do. I probably don’t tell her often enough that I am proud of how hard she works to provide for her kids and what a great mom she is.

Happy Birthday Noah!


She told me that this is the veining stage, looks strange but I can see that in a newborn.

She added violet layers, yellow layers- 40 layers in all.

Larissa asked for a little nose scratch and birth marks. She wants character.

There is no body yet.

She will be adding hair this week.


On Friday we went on a field trip to the children’s museum. We picked up Vaida and Owen so Tasha could sleep and we kept them overnight. The kids had a lot of fun but Benjamin really wanted to stay longer. I think I will take him back on day without any babies.

Different activities on the fake ice!

Of course all that play meant we needed some San Jose.

I cherish the time I can spend with my babies, they grow up so fast!

Benjamin Commercial

The day after we got back from Charlotte Benjamin was scheduled to do a commercial for a local company. It was his first commercial and I have to say he did great. For more than two hours he ran to different cars, opened the door and got in and then out. Then he spent time running to the cars and interacting with his “dad”. 

He loved it. I don’t know if he will do more but it was a great experience. 

Larissa asked me if she will ever be selected. Just the other day her agency called me, they told me that there are several agents in New York who want her in New York when she is older. Right now Benjamin is at the cute stage. He will grow into his awkward stage. Larissa is currently in the awkward stage, 5’10” tall but a child. She is at the awkward stage but will grow into her strength. She  really shines on the runway. She is signed with two agents in Atlanta who are working on growing her so she is ready for New York. Her local agent wants her to go to California this summer but we have decided that we do not want to do that at this time.  Instead we will work on homeschooling, growing and we have a photo series we plan on doing ourselves.

Wednesday, January 15, 2020

Reborn Doll

I posted that Larissa’s gift for Christmas was a scam but I don’t think I wrote how I resolved it. I gave her a coupon for a doll. She gave me a list of what she wanted and I am commissioning a doll from a local doll creator that I found. It is fascinating watching the steps. I get daily pictures. Anyone curious?

Larissa requested a sleeping biracial newborn with baby curls, pacifier magnet, imperfect newborn skin and wants it packaged for unveiling.

I picked the baby....

I was told it takes 30-50 layers of painting.

For the curious I will post some updates.

Tuesday, January 14, 2020


Back when I started this blog I was reading a lot of them. Slowly over the years my favorite bloggers stopped posting and disappeared. I started posting partially because I was reading so many blogs about how fantastic fostering and adoption were. Yes, it can be but there is a totally other side. The part that is hard. Where kids come with behaviors associated with trauma. Where as a foster parent you feel devalued by the system. Even within our society a few rotten foster parents make us all look like we do it for the money.

I wanted to give a little look at the other side. Not to scare people away but to make them aware that it can be hard. That child at your door step doesn’t want to be there. Their ways of survival may not be comparable with your home. Then again, maybe you can touch that one child who just needs a chance.

Everyone who foster or adopts has a different experience. Some more positive and some more negative. I feel that we have had a mix. Some children have healed and flourished. However, some of our children struggle to accept their family. However, at this time even the struggling kids are in school and growing even if in tiny increments.

We have had some foster kids come and go home or to family. We have had kids get TPR and we adopted. Recently we had our little one move to a placement that we hope can better offer him the extra help he needs. That one still breaks my heart, I love him so much. I recognize that I have my limits and worried about long term needs. He got younger parents and currently is an only child. He is where he needs to be to get what he needs. Still, it hurts.

I continue to blog because I feel that I have some readers who have been here since before Benjamin was born. I know some of you pray for success for my kids. I probably also have readers who are skeptical and assume I make stuff up. It is true, I don’t share everything but I feel I share enough for folks to understand our joys and struggles. Sometimes I disappear and struggle and miss big holes which is why I tell folks to let me know if I totally dropped the ball on a subject! I can’t imagine that I have too many new readers as blogging is declining. I can’t imagine anyone going back and reading our whole story of how we got here. I will continue to blog. I am not sure when I will stop. That is why I encourage folks to join my Instagram or send me a Facebook request. At some point I plan on writing a book. Not about our family but about our experiences and a fictional foster child. Kathy Cassel came and helped me with some planning. I hope to well out some time for that in the near future.

Having said all that, anyone reading a good blog? I miss some of my old ones and wonder how the families are doing.

Seizures Captured

They came in and removed her headgear. They captured three good seizures last night. Preliminary shows they come from both frontal lobes. They are going to change her doctor to one who specializes in her type of seizure. Blood work was good. They are still analyzing the data but we get to go home, whenever they finish their paperwork and take out her IV.