Saturday, August 31, 2019

School

Homeschool is coming along. Homeschool is pretty set but I need to find a microscope for some of the things we have to do in biology.

All the kids are settling into their classes, except for Benjamin. He is having some struggles. The class is divided into tables. At his table he had a kid who told him he was fancy pants every time he talked. It really bothered Benjamin and his teacher moved him. Then there was another kid who had "attitude and anger issues" (Benjamin's words). The kid would bang on their table and throw things.

One day Benjamin started crying about school and cried and cried. He had a huge list of reasons why he doesn't like school. First it is too long (they have 7 hours of class time with no naps), he doesn't like all the standing around, he is annoyed by the kids who hold up the line thus making big gaps, he doesn't like the food (so I pack him a lunch), the playground is too small and they aren't allowed on the grass, he is thirsty after going out and they only get to count to three when they drink, he doesn't like art (it is boring) and he doesn't like gym. His biggest complaint is that school is too long and he doesn't get home until almost dinner time. Honestly, for kindergarten I would rather they did half day but I haven't told him that. He does like his teacher and library time.

The next day when I picked him up he was in a much better mood. He said that the child with attitude and anger issues was moved from the classroom and a sweet girl was put in his place. After talking I realize how much that child was impacting Benjamin.

I posted on my Facebook about the incident and I had a mother with a child with special needs upset because she thinks that inclusion has been great for her child. OK, two points, I don't know if this child had special needs or not, a 5 year olds perception of attitude and anger issues may just be a child who is defiant or simply not ready for kindergarten. Second, placing a child with special needs in a class with no one being aware of it is unfair to everyone involved.

I have a master in special education and I do believe that inclusion can be a very good thing. However, everyone needs to be prepared for the inclusion and the kids need to be aware of what to expect. If this child had special needs then he should have been evaluated years ago. This is a pet peeve of mine. If you are struggling with your child have them evaluated. Services are free. There are services from birth up until they turn 3, then after 3 they are evaluated by the school and if qualified they attend school for free. That way when they start kindergarten they are not placed in a situation where no one is prepared. Actually if they start services early they may not need help by time they start school.


That is the playground that 45 kids play on at one time. I had to laugh, he said that we have more play equipment at home. That is the grass they can't play on. Really, how do 45 kids play there?

Really, his biggest complaint these days is that the day is too long. So say a little prayer for my boy that he will come to love school. He has a long way to go in school!

Thursday, August 22, 2019

Ugh

I am going to be honest here, apparently I am a terrible foster mom and not a good adoptive placement.

A few days after we got back from vacation adoptions came over. They had some concerns. One was that I hadn't taken foster kid for his incoming doctors appointment. Well, I hadn't done that because I was his 5th placement, from what I knew I didn't have to. I had an eye exam scheduled at that time. Then she complained about no therapist appointment. Well, he sees the therapist at school. No issues to think that he needed more. Then she said that my house was too cluttered and looks like house that they pull kids from! I was in shock and didn't even know what to say. Our toddler kid took all my energy and made normal activities difficult. But, he left the day before we left on vacation, then we went on vacation and came back on a Saturday with 9 days of laundry. Sunday we celebrated foster sons birthday and Monday I had started on the house. They came on Tuesday and licensing was scheduled on Wednesday. They said that they weren't even going to continue our adoption home study!

After they left I started to get mad. My house is cluttered with clothing of all sorts, toys, shoes, baby supplies, laundry, craft supplies and such. All things of a big, active family.  Yes, we have too much stuff. Yes, we have writing on the walls and the trim needs repainting. They haven't complained about it being dirty, just cluttered.

I called adoptions to say that it was rather insulting to say that our home was a home that they pull kids from. She told me that our home was fine for kids that need a foster home but not as an adoptive home. That she understood that I was having a hard time and that she could have the kids moved so that they could get to know their adoptive family! Uh, no, there aren't homes ready and waiting for a 9 year old with anger issues and his 16 year old sister. Then she said that we were on a clean up plan with licensing. Huh, first I heard of that.

I called the social worker. She was shocked. Made me cancel the therapist appointments I made because missing school was not an option and school therapy is fine. Told me that he didn't need a doctors appointment for when he moved to our home. Also told me that when our teen went to the foster care review board while we were on vacation that she told them that she would only leave the children home to come to our home, she wanted to come to our home and be adopted by us. The social worker said we are her best foster home (we have had 5 of her kids). She contacted them to put in a complaint and they denied saying any of that.

The next day licensing comes over. They had called her and she told them that he didn't have to have a physical. She also told them that she didn't see a problem with our house. She was confused when I said that they said I was on a clean up plan because I wasn't. She walked around the house. There were a bunch of craft supplies on the table from crafts which she saw as positive.

Our first reaction was to say we have had enough. However, we have two kids that expect more from us and we have committed to. So we are playing the game. If their concern is our stuff we will get rid of it. It is hard though, the other day I was running out in a rain storm to grab some stuff that Benjamin saw in the truck that he claimed he still played with. Clothing is an issue. One dryer died so we are down to one washer and dryer. We have a schedule and everyone has to wash their clothing on their day. I was sorting clothing because we have so many kids that we pass down to. However, I determined that I just don't have time to sort so I sat with a trash can and threw out a bunch of clothing. We threw out a bunch of socks. I haven't been able to toss any craft supplies!

I will admit, I am confused by the whole thing. I wonder if they have the right person because we haven't been on a clean up plan. I think last time they came out was during our termite fiasco. That was messy and costly but there was no way around the mess if you wanted the room to be safe. I have called numerous workers who are confused. The GAL thinks it is crazy. We have adopted 6 foster kids with no problems. Heck, five of those kids are at home making the messes. I have had to let it go and move forward. We were asked to take three different kids today and I said no as I am planning on repainting the interior of the house. I am trying to decide if I should do some new colors or stick with the old. For the kids I will play their game. However, I look forward to getting out of foster care so I don't have to worry about our clutter.



Celebrating Ava


Celebrating Ava turning 1! Time flies, the grand babies are all growing up so fast. 

Kassi had a baking problem so Sarah and Tasha came up with some sweets for her. Sometimes family works as it should!













Kassi has really grown as a mom. Her relationships with her biological family are strained and some are toxic. She is finally seeing that and comes to the family for more support. Sometimes you don't realize that growth is happening because it is in small increments. Regardless, she is growing up and I love the woman she has become.



Tie Dye/paint pour party

We hosted a tie dye/paint pour party because that is what we love to do.

















Then we did some more tie dye because we had some shirts and left over dye. I still have more to rinse out tonight.



Who likes to tie dye?

New School Year



New school year and I have:

Anthony 10th grade
new kiddo 10th grade
Michelle 9th grade
Larissa 8th grade homeschool
Emma 6th grade
Kiddo 4th grade
Benjamin Kindergarten

I don't have pictures of everyone, not all cooperated!





Hardest part was taking Benjamin to class, he is such a sweet child and I'd love to keep him with me.

His teacher sent me a picture during the day...


He is loving school but reports that there is a child at his table who has "attitude and anger issues". Hopefully it will calm down soon.

New Kid

Larissa now has a roommate, foster sons 16 year old sister. She came last week and thankfully I was able to get her enrolled on Monday to start classes on Monday. I am very broke right now with all the back to school supplies. The $100 they gave us didn't go far when you have to buy backpacks, shoes, clothing and supplies. 


Summer break came to a close so we had to go for snocones.




I have been stressed a bit lately so had to do a paint pour.


Wednesday, August 21, 2019

Halifax

Last port. We just got off the ship and walked around..... and ate.






Halifax is a beautiful city. I loved the mix of old and new.


The kids loved the museum.










We found painted rocks for sale.


Donuts of course.


The city had rainbows everywhere.


















The last lighthouse.


Those of us who like sushi took a sushi making class on the ship. Best meal we had on the ship!












We enjoyed the shows that they had at night.



The ocean sure is beautiful and big when it is calm.