Monday, August 16, 2010

Day of Joy/Day of Sadness

The joy............

Required first day of school pictures. Yes, Reptar backpack.

My day started at 5 am when school transportation called me to tell me that they would be picking Larissa up at 6:15 am. By 5:10 am I realized that they said 6:15 am so I called them back and said I would take her. They could bring her home. She got home at 1pm.....her class ended at 10:45. Uh, that is not going to work either. Two hours on the bus for a 3 hour class. I am contemplating taking her out of this program and increasing her extracurricular activities and private speech. I am not making a decision right now.
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Everyone had a good day. Sarah's main complaint was her math teacher, she got homework on the first day of school. I got to help her do a word problem tonight, I don't like word problems. How fast is the elevator in the Washington Monument in miles per hour given the feet per second, yuck.
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She didn't have any issues today with kids. I am hoping that the bullying issues don't resurface.
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Anthony had a green day, which makes it a good day. He has grown some over the summer so I really hope that he can function better this year. Typically he has a first good week so I am enjoying it.
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I think that it is going to be a good year for these three.
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I start classes in Thursday and haven't even bought my books yet. Have I ever mentioned that I have to fight my procrastination issues? However, I do look forward to attending classes and seeing adults!
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The sadness...............
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It has actually been a hard day for me, my heart is breaking and I am trying to hide it from the kids. They have their own issues to deal with and don't need to see me crying. I did that in private today. Joselin is gone.........she is on a bus back to Memphis. She says she is done with us.
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She came home and couldn't deal with our rules. Really, our rules are not that difficult, have I ever mentioned that I am a big softie? Things like don't lie, steal, sneak out the window at 2am, respect others in the home....all too difficult. Her stealing used to remain in the home, she started stealing from her friends. Calls from parents started.
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She just reached the point where she didn't care anymore. I still care. Regardless of what she thinks or wants, we are still her family. I told her that, she says she rejects us. Today I just don't feel the hope that I normally have in my heart.
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I could say profound things about adoption, love, how biological children have the same issues, how to keep giving in spite of the challenges, however, all I can think to say is that sometimes parenting just plain sucks!

5 comments:

  1. My heart breaks with yours for this young lady. Will continue to hold all in prayer.

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  2. It sounds like we are in the same places. Jeff is doing screwy stuff at his home for troubled youth. He is mad at them and wants to come home. I can't trust him home. Probably not ever.

    Right now I don't think I am going to pass 4th grade math! Augh. Where is the review chapter????

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  3. Life is sometimes as difficult as we make it. Joselin never wanted to apply herself in school, deflected her behavior on everyone in her current life and past, and wanted to do what she wanted regardless of the afffect on others. Her life could be different, if she could understand that though she can't change yesterday can affect tomorrow.

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  4. The kids look great - and soooo happy too. Joselin will sort herself out in time.

    Where I live in Libya, it is customary for children to live with their parents until they marry. And if your kids never marry they are with you for life!

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  5. we wouldn't have minded if Joselin lived with us as long as she was willing to follow house rules. Sneaking out of the house at 2am is not among those rules. Every time we threatened to clamp down on the rules she just threatened to leave. She did leave once but really wasn't ready to survive on her own so was back after a few days.

    I find it scary that when she left she met up with a man she met on the internet. Then she wonders why I pulled her internet card! Sarah was afraid that she would invite one of those men to our house while I was away.

    She is now in a state where you have to go to school until 18 and can't just leave home like here in SC.

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