Yes, I nag my children. I nag them to do their chores. I nag them to read. I nag then to do well in school. I nag them to respect their teachers and other adults they come into contact with. I nag them about brushing their teeth.
I don't know why they can't remember to do the things that they need to do. Since they can't, I nag. I feel as though that is my job.
Yesterday as I was nagging my teen about her school work she revealed to me that no one had ever pushed her to finish her work before. No one had checked her homework before. No one had helped her with her homework. No one cared if she did it or not. That may explain why she struggles in school. She has not been nagged before about her school work!
I wonder if the kids understand why I nag....it is because I care. I care that they are successful in what they do. I care that they are literate and graduate from school. I care that their teeth don't rot out of their mouth. I care that they learn to do house chores so that they can take care of their own one day. I care that they grow up to be respectful adults and in turn teach their children to be respectful to adults.
I care, therefore I nag!
I have a checklist in my teen's room and he has to go through and check off each thing he does. It includes most of the things you mentioned--get up, get dressed, fold PJs, sweep room, clean bathroom, do dishes, pack lunch etc. That way I can just say, "Have you completed your list" when he asks to do something.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if any really don't understand Moms nag because they care until they are nagging their own children!! :)
ReplyDeleteMy struggling teen won't wear deoderant. We've nagged, we've fussed, we've required it. She will for a bit- then she won't again and pretty soon the problem reveals itself once again by the stink that can be traced to her. We nag because we care if the other kids at school make fun of her because she smells sweaty. We tell her that- she still doesn't "get it" that we care about her being embarressed over something that is easily prevented. And if she can't "get" that, then I don't think we have much hope of her understanding why we nag about the less straight forward things. AAhhh!!!
Felicia,
ReplyDeleteI couldn't find your email address on your blog. But, I wanted to ask you about sharing some of your foster care posts with my readers, or about writing one regarding foster care. Email me if you're interested. (ladies@oneshetwoshe.com)
Thanks!
Mariel
www.oneshetwoshe.com