Monday, January 27, 2014

Stay Calm

Emma has been moved to Larissa's closet. 

Turned out the FROG was not a safe place for her since there is storage on both sides for her to get into.  I was sitting there trying to determine where to put her when Larissa came up and offered her room for Emma.  She said that she wanted to share with Michelle.

Hmmm, interesting development.  We have been working hard on the relationship between Michelle and Larissa.  There have been some good moments.  They have been playing well for longer periods of time.  When I see them playing together I have been praising them and making them aware of how it feels to be getting along.

Larissa decided that she was going to be a cosmetologist and Michelle was her first Victim....her client. That was a great day, they played together for hours. 

I see growth in Michelle.  As we clamped down on lying she has even started telling the truth much more often.  Funny, we started our lying campaign because of my concern for her lying and Emma got caught up in the net and a bigger concern came to the front.

Unfortunately, Michelle can also be a bully.  Her new thing is biting.  Not good. 

So we made the move.  I have some reservations.  I also have hope.  I am willing to give it a try. To change a behavior you have to replace it with an appropriate behavior that you want.  The plan is that the more time they spend together playing well, the less time Michelle bullies.

Emma is in her new room with a door alarm.

She is not happy but nothing seems to make her happy at this time (unless it is sneaking food).

Today I handed her a freshly laundered stack of folded clothing.  For half an hour she screamed that she didn't want to put them away.  Calmly, I told her that she didn't have to put them away.  She could sleep with them, I really didn't care.  When we got tired of hearing her screaming that she didn't want to put them away I calmly went in and took them out.  She wasn't too happy with that either.  She screamed about her clothing getting taken away for a while then started banging the cabinet doors.

Calmly I went in with a screw gun and removed the doors.  I noticed that she was tearing up her bedding.  I pointed out that under all that bedding was a wood base.  I told her that it was her bed and she was free to tear it up all she wanted; however, I would not be replacing it.  Her choice.

Thankfully it was then dinner time and she was happy to come and eat.  Not having an opportunity to graze has made a difference in her meal eating habits, she ate seconds!  She has never eaten seconds before.

There has been a side benefit to all this, I have been doing some decluttering.  Things got moved that have been sitting around for years.  I have also been setting up my painting area in the garage.  

Now I am off to search for more toys, clothing and shoes that belong to my foster kids.  They have court today and looks like they may go home.

1 comment:

  1. You're doing a great job. Weather the storm...hang in there. She'll figure it out eventually. (Can you tell I coach myself the same way all the time?) Praying it all works out having Larissa and Michelle together.