Years

Every time I go to therapy Dimples appears to be nice and sweet.  Last therapy session my nephew was with us and asked who that girl was.  He was shocked by her behavior....because it was so good.  He had just stayed at our house a few days so he knows how Dimples behaves at home.

However, she does show some of her real self.  I am so thankful that I found a therapist who actually understand attachment disorders.  She came into the waiting room to get us and said hello to Dimples who pretended that she didn't hear her.  Someone who doesn't know her ways would have really thought that she didn't hear.  The therapist greeted again right in front of her and expected a response.  She did get it.  There are a lot of those little subtle things that others don't understand. 

What do we deal with besides the screaming?  There are times when she ignores you, does the total opposite of what you tell her, pretends that she didn't hear you say no, doing what she wants as soon as you look away, saying little hurtful things to her siblings, lying, lying, claiming all possessions in the home are hers, destroying the other kids possessions, manipulating through lying to get her way or hurt another child feelings but making it appear as though someone else did it, demanding that she get her way and if not screaming, attempting to take control of everyone, lying.  There are times when she can be so affectionate, hugging and kissing.  However, it doesn't feel real.  It feels fake and as though it is a manipulation.

Every time we go to therapy the therapist tells me it is going to take years for her to heal.  Years, yes years.  I have been afraid to ask if she thinks that there is a chance that she may never heal.  I don't know if I want that answer right now.