How do you feel about sleepovers? I am very selective and leery of them. I worry about older sons in the home and husbands/boyfriends. I guess I am a bit paranoid. It isn't that I never allow them, I am just very selective. Some of my kids have only spent the night at family or a specific friend of mine. Emma had been nagging me to spend the night at one of her friends house. I had been holding off as I didn't know that family well. The mom is a teacher at her school. After a while I relented and decided to allow her to spend the night. We are trying for "normal" childhood positive experiences.
The sleepover went well. The rebound effect didn't go so well. She got in the car and I asked how it went. She started yelling at me about some birthday party and why didn't she get to go. Huh? I didn't know about any such party. Well, she did and she planned on going. Speaking to me in such a tone that didn't bode well for future sleepovers.
Why is it when I allow certain kids to have new, positive experiences it always ends with a huge dose of self-entitlement? It makes it so hard to allow them to do anything. An interesting side issue that I note is her sense of superiority that she seems to hold onto. She talked about how their house was in a bad area and the house so small. Uh, it was in a newer, nice subdivision and a 2800 sq ft home! I have no idea what will happen to her when reality hits her in the future. I reminded her that our home is our home for her use and we worked hard for it. She will not start out in a big house when she goes off on her own.
So do you allow sleepovers?
Oh, I so understand about the sense of entitlement afterwards. I could not even eat lunch with the twins at school because afterwards they would act out like crazy. Feel superior to the point of hitting other students. That was many years ago. Now we have the middle school version of it. But not the superiority. More like, they have a real home and we only have a double wide manufactured home.
ReplyDeleteSleepoevers in our family depends entirely on the situation. All my kids are allowed sleepovers with our closest friends. Whitney is allowed sleepovers with any of the girls in her friend group because we know them and their families. Kate isn't allowed to go to sleepovers with anyone besides her best friend. She can have a friend over here, but I'm picky about which friends. No sleepovers for Meghan. Period. I don't trust her at all, even at home with friends. Jackson doesn't want sleepovers.
ReplyDeleteWe're lucky to not have the superiority thing going on at all.