Saturday, April 11, 2015

The Gambler


a. To bet on an uncertain outcome, as of a contest.
b. To play a game of chance for stakes.
2. To take a risk in the hope of gaining an advantage or a benefit.
3. To engage in reckless or hazardous behavior: You are gambling with your health by continuing to smoke.
1. To put up as a stake in gambling; wager.
2. To expose to hazard; risk: gambled their lives in a dangerous rescue mission.
1. bet, wager, or other gambling venture.
2. An act or undertaking of uncertain outcome; a risk: took a gamble that stock prices would rise.

I have come to realize that I have a gambler.  My gambler doesn't care if the stakes are high or low.  She is wiling to gamble that she won't get caught.  

I came to this conclusion yesterday after a small incident.  We were having stew for dinner and Michelle asked if she could get some bread with butter.  I told her to go get it but to not put a lot of butter on it.  I repeated myself (this has been an issue).  She was actually using margarine and I don't see much nutritional value in it.  We have been disagreeing over her margarine usage.  By too much I mean almost a 1/2 inch of butter on a piece of bread.  I have showed her how to butter her bread.

She is sitting next to me at the dinner table when I look at her half eaten bread.  There was more than a 1/4 inch of butter.  I looked at her and asked her if she did what I asked about the butter. She said no.  I asked her why.  She said she didn't know.  I get that answer often.  Then I told her that I wouldn't accept that answer.  What was she thinking or feeling when she chose to slather on that margarine.  She paused for a minute and then said that she thought she might be able to get away with it.

Now the issue with butter may not seem like a big issue.  It isn't the butter it is the disregard for what I tell her.  All day, every day she disregards our rules and things that I tell her.  I imagine that many times she gets away with the small things in the busyness of our family.  Every time she gets away with it she feels that she has won the lottery.  Obviously for her the consequences aren't enough to stop her.  Honestly I am out of ideas for consequences.  

So every day, all day Michelle is gambling.  She is betting that she won't get caught.  She wins often enough that she is willing to gamble on not getting caught. The consequences aren't high enough to make her stop.

Yes, I have a gambler.


  1. Kaleb does that. Or he puts the knife back in after he's licked it. He loses the chance to use any extras for a week-butter, pb, syrup, jelly, anything. That way I don't have to keep track. He wiped crumbs into the butter last Monday so has not been able to use anything this week. His toast, waffles etc are plain.

  2. I am not even kidding that Michelle and my Mitchell sound just like twins!! It is so very hard! We have started using essential oils on Mitchell and have seen a marked improvement in that kind of behavior. Things are not perfect, but improving enough for all of us to be able to breathe. We had him zyto scanned and then after seeing what oils came up, we looked up the emotional aspects those oils help and were shocked to find all the things he is struggling with or has dealt with in his past show in the list of oils his body needed. Made me cry. And at that point, willing to try anything so he can learn to love himself, praying that one day he can love us.