Friday, April 3, 2015

Little Man

Little Man has been quite busy. He is trying very hard to walk down the stairs without using the side wall. So far he has not succeeded as the bruises on his forehead will tell you.

He has learned how to climb onto chairs and thus the dining room table.  There are always treasures to be found there.  Today he learned how to open doors.  Folks, this is not a good thing!  Good thing we have squeaky shoes to keep track of him between all the door slamming.

Besides mama and daddy his favorite word is outside.  He loves to be outside.  I have a video of him sliding down the slide.  It is hilarious and proof that he will be a roller coaster boy.  Wish I could share, perhaps later.

He is also my first baby to have seasonal allergies.  I took him to the doctors today and came out with antibiotics for a double ear infection.  He wasn't running a fever or pulling at his ears. He just seemed a little fussier.  Since his nose has been running nonstop since the cars turned green outside I figured he would have ear issues.

That band-aid......lasted 3 minutes.


The red hair is still red.  Is it possible for it to be any redder?  The other day an elderly lady came up and rubbed his head for good luck.  I didn't know that was a thing.  Learn something new every day. Since I rub his head every day something great must be coming.  Hopefully it will be a new birth certificate with the name of Benjamin on it.

Today his aunt came by.  She said that his mother is with a new guy who has kids of his own.  She expects that she will be pregnant soon if she already isn't.  If she does have another child it will be her 5th.  Yes, her 5th and she is raising none of them.

I have such different feelings with this situation.  It is appropriate to talk about the mother's loss. About how much the biological mother is losing and the grief that comes with that.  By us adopting, someone is losing.

However, honestly I don't feel that way with this one.  His mother has done nothing on her plan.  She did the big talk but hasn't done anything.  Now the family is telling me that on all the visits she never held him, they did.  I saw this and the SW saw this but we assumed that his momma held him at some point.  On the last visit she came to she was told that she had to come alone, no more family members were allowed. She never came back for another visit. She was never alone with her son.  When told that she needed to bond with her child she walked away.  She hasn't been heard from since.

It is crazy.  I just can't imagine.  I am a very empathetic person but I am having a hard time feeling empathy towards her.  I don't feel anger.  I don't actually feel anything towards her and that is unusual for me. I will say though, that she brought a beautiful child into this world and in these days of abortions I greatly appreciate that. He is such a blessing for us.

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