tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980635032314035803.post8243477959815337971..comments2024-02-28T17:35:23.639-06:00Comments on Stare if you must..........: StrugglingFeliciahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05558893889667088182noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980635032314035803.post-71003780963437612012010-10-20T19:00:32.433-05:002010-10-20T19:00:32.433-05:00When I go back and read these blogs about Joselin ...When I go back and read these blogs about Joselin they still hurt. I originally wondered if I should post such personal stuff, but I know that this side of adoption needs to be out there. Love doesn't cure everything, I wish it did.Feliciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05558893889667088182noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980635032314035803.post-63424798775611347342010-10-19T22:11:59.597-05:002010-10-19T22:11:59.597-05:00Boy do we have a lot in common. Especially wonderi...Boy do we have a lot in common. Especially wondering if we could have done more. I blog about my two boys with issues, although I don't give specifics, in hopes that others won't feel alone and in hopes that someone will leave an encouraging word for me.Kathy Casselhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02886511489428522492noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980635032314035803.post-76563532838126017732010-06-01T06:17:54.506-05:002010-06-01T06:17:54.506-05:00Thanks for the reply. I hope I didn't offend y...Thanks for the reply. I hope I didn't offend you. I really enjoy your posts and pictures, but that was a question I had and decided I should go ahead and ask :)RWhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16170474141419070128noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980635032314035803.post-21375703791345165112010-05-31T18:42:52.472-05:002010-05-31T18:42:52.472-05:00Yes, Joselin knows that I blog. Although it may n...Yes, Joselin knows that I blog. Although it may not seem like it, I actually don't blog about many of her issues. However, I know that her issues are not unique. I hope that someone who is contemplating older child adoption can realize what issues they may face and perhaps be better prepared. <br /><br />I do hope that one day I can blog about great healing for Joselin. For now, we support her and hope that one day she will want her family. We are her family and won't give up.<br /><br />(I also blogged about my son and his struggles, I asked his permission first)Feliciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05558893889667088182noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980635032314035803.post-86806590010993879332010-05-31T18:02:36.976-05:002010-05-31T18:02:36.976-05:00I just found your blog on blogfrog. Some of your p...I just found your blog on blogfrog. Some of your posts are so heartbreaking? I do have a concern. Does Joselin know you are blogging about her and her current issues? It just seems that these are so sensitive and should she (and hopefully she will) mature and change one day, how will she feel knowing that her past issues are available online for all to see (posted by her own mother)?RWhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16170474141419070128noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980635032314035803.post-70412747457121327012010-04-14T13:31:59.850-05:002010-04-14T13:31:59.850-05:00I am praying for this girl of yours, that things w...I am praying for this girl of yours, that things will start to click for her during her time with Kim. <br /><br />Blessings, <br />Lisaroadrunner201https://www.blogger.com/profile/06108866769358292786noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980635032314035803.post-82740035331391921672010-04-14T08:05:55.376-05:002010-04-14T08:05:55.376-05:00Reading this here, Felicia, makes me want to comme...Reading this here, Felicia, makes me want to comment a little bit more from my comment this morning on the BF thread. It seems like Joselin's mom did indeed likely set her up with unrealistic expectations about an adoptive family. I'm sure that her tie to her birthmom is VERY strong, even if it is not a healthy relationship. And you are right, that was transferred to you. She loves you, but she is also fearful that you will "send her away" like her birthmom did. I don't know the circumstances of her relinquishment, don't get me wrong, but in a sense (at least in her mind), her mom did send her away.<br />I recently read "Adoption is trauma." That's so true. I adopted my first 2 kids because I'm selfish and I wanted to be a mommy (I did not try to conceive, just wanted to be a mommy). I thought MY love would make everything fine. I thought since I picked up my girls before they were 1 year of age (one was 4 months and the other was 9 months) that they wouldn't have any issues. While they don't have severe issues, they do have issues. <br />We have an open adoption with my oldest daughter's birthfamily in Guatemala. My daughter had great anxiety about Guatemala and her adoption. After meeting her birthfamily face to face, she had a great sense of relief. I am not suggesting that this is what Joselin needs (or wants). I just wanted to share that so many kids process things so differently.<br />I've enjoyed our conversation.Mommy's Journeyshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05004412794113332556noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980635032314035803.post-57807002863637718332010-04-13T13:23:56.121-05:002010-04-13T13:23:56.121-05:00Joselin lived with her mom and grandmother at diff...Joselin lived with her mom and grandmother at different times. She only lived at the hogar for one year. We do know many of the issues she is dealing with but just have not had much success. Three therapists have not been able to help her. The main person she talks to is me. She is not willing/not able/doesn't even want to move forward. She is not willing to forgive her biomom for things and a lot of that was transferred to us.<br /><br />Joeslin's biomom did not help her to transition at all. She told Joselin to never call me mom (she does) and wanted her to go back to Guatemala at 16 to support her. Joselin does not want to go back to Guatemala (although she did for years). She says that Guatemala is not a place for women or children.Feliciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05558893889667088182noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980635032314035803.post-29689799772765469312010-04-13T13:01:21.183-05:002010-04-13T13:01:21.183-05:00awww... My heart is just breaking for your family!...awww... My heart is just breaking for your family! You and J will be in my prayers!Quirky Mommahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08661905313806922890noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980635032314035803.post-67678315175512912742010-04-13T10:59:33.775-05:002010-04-13T10:59:33.775-05:00I do hope that Joselin has some healing. I'm ...I do hope that Joselin has some healing. I'm sure she has started with your family, but I hope she has more.<br />What was her life like in Guatemala? Did she live with her birthfamily until she came to live with you? If she lived in an hogar/orphanage, what was the name of it? Perhaps looking at her life in Guatemala will give you some answers to help her (or help Kim help her) to have more healing. <br />I have 2 daughters adopted from Guatemala as infants (now ages 7 and 10 years) and I have one more adoption there underway now of a 5 year old little girl.Mommy's Journeyshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05004412794113332556noreply@blogger.com